“And then you cry when they rape you” – II

” Bwacya babafata ku ngufu bagasakuza. Ibyo wandaritse mu muhanda washyize ku gasozi ushatse wese ntakoraho? Nibemere bahitemo, bemere ko imibiri yabo iba ibikinisho by’ababonetse bose cyangwa bayubahe bayisubize agaciro.”

//And then when they rape you, you make noise. Doesn’t anything you display in the street or put outside become free for all? Let them choose: either they accept that their bodies are toys for anybody or respect their bodies and regain their value//

Immaculé Ingabire
http://mobile.igihe.com/imyidagaduro/article/minisitiri-nyirasafari-yasabye-rib-gukurikirana-isimbi-ingabire-we-amwita

With these violent words, you did more harm to women than any naked woman will ever do.
With these violent words, you said you stand with the rapists.
With these violent words, you are saying that being vulnerable is reason anough to be raped, being free is reason enough to be raped, claiming the rights to your own body is reason enough to be raped, and screaming for help is a waste of time because you deserve it, in fact, you asked for it.

I am a Rwandan woman and I am scared.
I used to look up to you. I know if anybody looks up to me, I will inevitably disappoint them too. I just I hope it won’t be in a way that makes them unsafe in their own homeland.

I feel betrayed, and I feel embarrassed because I am so proud of the gender equality in our country’s leadership. Because I expect a Rwandan woman leader to be pro-femmes and this is what we get. Slut-shaming, victim-blaming, rape apologism, and the general silencing of womenfolk.

I have not seen an actual definition of what “ibintu by’urukozasoni” are, but these words are up there on the list of things I would consider shameful.

And yet I have hope. I am hoping you were misquoted. Misunderstood. Maybe you did not mean it ? Maybe you spoke too fast? I know this is a big risk for further disappointment, since you once said that “a girl who has been tasted is like milk with flies in it” but I am willing to take it. Maybe you will restore my faith in your Humanity.

Isimbi did not expose herself. The journalists who published her pictures did. Her body is hers to dispose of as she wishes, but stealing her pictures without her consent and spreading it to the masses is questionable.

Women’s bodies have been used and abused for centuries and they were silent. Your generation endured in silence, ours is being silenced, you want our children to die silently too? We say No. It stops here.

We shall make the noise. We shall cry, yell, scream, shout. We will not be abused in silence so that your culture can remain intact. You will hear us, you will see us, you will be bothered.

PS: Now those saying that anyone who stands with Isimbi should just go ahead and post nudes should realise how absurd that is. Imagine if we asked all of you who stand with rapists to go ahead and rape women too. Some of you maybe will or already have, but there are different ways of showing support. I might post nudes or not, but for now, I stand for gender equality, I stand for fairness, I stand for justice, I stand for freedom, I stand for integrity.
#IStandWithIsimbi